Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
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