Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
