Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
