Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
