Can Purell be used as lube?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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