I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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