All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize