Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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