Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
