Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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