Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
