After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
