Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Randomize
