Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
