bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Randomize