he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
