Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
