so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills