I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize