I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
