hell yes lets make some ravioli
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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