@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours