Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
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