I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
