absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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