I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
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I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
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The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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