wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
