Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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