he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!