lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
wow bdsm is so cute
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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