She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
