whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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