My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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