he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
