im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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