Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
