So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize