So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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