We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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