he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
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