i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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