He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
