Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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