wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
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I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
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Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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