i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
