I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Randomize
