i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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