i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
FUCK WHALES
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