She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I'm experimenting with sincerity
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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