Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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