You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
